Friday, June 14


Today was the day we made the decision which culminated in our eldest son's death on the evening/morning of 15th/16th June.  This year has been harder as he would of been 16, I have just ordered the flowers for him and had the poor girl on the other end of the 'phone in tears with me.  I am not writing this for anyone to comment, I just sometimes need to write my feelings down or I feel like I will burst. I just feel so helpless that sending flowers is all I can do.  I started this entry because I felt like I needed to vent but now I just don't know what to type, too many emotions swimming around, I do know that your children shouldn't die before you do.

Thursday, June 13

This weekend

I haven't blogged in a while and I'm not sure why, possibly because Facebook is easier to put a few lines up rather than type a veritable essay and because this year is very difficult.

This year our eldest son would of been 16 and we should already have had a fabulous 16th Birthday bash for him, but as usual non of this applies.  This weekend is the anniversary of his death, once again the date has fallen on Father's day, but as this was the day he died it isn't any easier for Tye if the dates falls on this day or not.

I spoke to someone today who has lost a father and she was telling me that its gets easier!!  I had to disagree, thankfully I haven't lost a parent so I have no idea how she feels, but I know I still hurt and still ache for my child and what he would of become and the life that was unjustly taken from him.  I am still very bitter and I think I always will be, don't get me wrong, life goes on but I can't help but wonder how different it would of been and envy those of my friends with two little boys to watch grow up.

I am so proud of my son Kai, he is turning out to be a wonderful young man who will be 15 soon and he knows that I love him very much, but he also knows that I miss his brother dreadfully.

I am not looking forward to this weekend it is going to be very difficult, we have a family event to go to which if circumstances were different and we had been able to attend all events leading up to this we wouldn't be attending.  I am saddened by the choice of date but then again I don't expect everyone to remember all the anniversaries, as usual all I can do is send my boy a posy of white flowers and a message with all our love always.

Saturday, October 6

Maria, Elizabeth, Angela and I went to ScrapStars retreat, loved it, they have stopped now which is a shame, two of my favourite teachers Lida and Emma, unfortunately Rachael wasn't there this time, which was a shame as I really enjoyed her classes and love her style. 
We had great fun and the classes were very good, really enjoyed myself, my favourite class was Lida’s Journey book, perfect for my photos of Italy.

This was Kirsty's class very clever loved it
One of Emma's classes brilliant as always

One of lida's classes totally outside the box 
The middle part of the book incorporating metal

the bottom part of the book complete with mini book

The top part of the book using Tim Holtz negative strips

This was one of Jolan's classes

Mum got a new puppy, her first girl, she is called Korin and as you can see is a cross between a German Shepherd and a Labrador. She was such an adorable puppy so pleased that we got to see her when she was tiny, she is now about 8 months old.

Of course cannot forget Norman who went into his first phase of training, he has passed with flying colours and is now onto his final phase of training.

Norman and mom's dog william

Next instalment, I think I am probably in May now...

Kai had some friends stay over and they decided to do a ‘Man Test’ and eat extra hot chilli’s the results were funny.  Well to me anyway lol.

The tears that were pouring down their faces lol it looked really painful, not sure if they passed at all....

OMG I can't believe that its been so long since I updated this............

Ok sorry to anyone to does read this if they get bored, but I tend to use it to look back on to remember what I have actually done during the year, old age and my memory not being the best nowadays!!!!

April being the month of Easter we followed some of the Big Egg Clues in London, we found quite a few of them.  There were some really unusual ones, mind you if we had waited a couple of days they would of all been in one place, but apparently that takes the fun out of walking and finding them!!!  hmm think I could of done without all the traipsing around....

Whilst we were in London we found the New Choccywoccydoodah shop, and OMG the smell of chocolate was lush and the creations amazing. They were unbelievable to look at, the work that must of gone into them. Unfortunately it is a non-chocolate year so all I could do was look.

Met up with some of the girls and went to Winchester, we went for a meal first and then into the Cathedral grounds, we must have looked extremely strange not sure how many of us there were but quite a few all with tripods taking pictures in the dark….  It was a great evening, a good laugh and we didn't realised how long we spent over the meal, we were busy taking photo's of the Cathedral one minute then the next they turned the lights out....

I think I am going to have to update in parts of this is going to be a very long entry.

Friday, March 23

Once again 'TIME' has escaped me ....

Ok what have I been up to?

Hmm finally gave in and ordered two pairs of glasses, the tear ducts in my eyes have been drying up due to my medication and I have been avoiding this for years but finally did it, I bought one pair in pink and one in purple, but of course had to get some more contacts too.

Went to the cinema with a friend and saw 'The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel'  it was really good and made me laugh in quite a few parts, the cast was excellent.

The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel Poster

I had an amazing Mother's Day, the boys looked after me really well, breakfast in bed, then I scrapped in my workshop all day, had lunch made for me, hot and cold drink brought to me and then an Indian Take-Away and the Ice Skating live.

They bought me a purple and silver shamballa bracelet and a china cup for my tea.

I have recently become hooked on 'Pinterest' it is an amazing site and I love it, through it I discovered Scrapbook etc. and found some fabulous scrapbook sketches and inspiration, after sorting through all my photos I know need to get on and scrap them so with that in mind I have been working my way through the sketches, these are the ones I have done so far.  If you download the sketches to your computer they download as a PDF file and there is the sketch and an example which is always useful.  Great site for other ideas as well.

The Rosettes were made with the Tim Holtz die cutters and the stamps on the circles are Stampin Up

She will kill me for this one, but she doesn't often go on the Internet and I just had to document it.

OMG Christmas this year done think I still have another 10 Christmas's to scrap

This one was to document the silhouette of a soldier that Tye had covered up on his back with his new tribal tattoo, he always joked that the soldier looked like a lump of coal.

Still have the journaling to fill in on this one, but he looks so cute in his West Ham Kit.

Have always loved these photos the colours are gorgeous they look a bit bright in the photo though.

There is an 's' to go on the end of  'colour' but after spending 20 minutes inking the letters then diamond glazing them and then waiting 30 Min's for them to dry when the 's' pinged and I couldn't find it I gave up will either find it or do another one.